I really love this song Come Pick Me Up by Ryan Adams.
I've had a dream about this random guy in school I don't even know for a couple nights now.
It's really weird, he just keeps popping up in parts of my dreams, and that is all I remember.
I got a nasty bruise on my toes because I fell. In my own home, it's just ridiculous.
I haven't written anything serious in a while, I should start soon enough.
I'm just drinking some soymilk to balance out the nasty burger I had. yum. That's how it is with me, when I have something bad, it just makes sense that it's not so bad anymore when you have something good.
Today I got all dressed up and cleaned, but I did not go outside at all.
Story of my sad day.
I hope I have something to write about soon.
Love&Jewels
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
DiaUno
Dia uno of summer vacation!
I thought I can upload all the pictures from graduation, but after uploading three, I realized how long this will take. And I'm just not willing to spend so much of my time on this blog.
I thought I can upload all the pictures from graduation, but after uploading three, I realized how long this will take. And I'm just not willing to spend so much of my time on this blog.
Love&Jewels
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Back.
Ooh, I forgot to add a little somethingsomething about my weekend away.
It was so much better than what I had expected. Because all this time, I had thought this weekend away was going to cause trouble, but I came back feeling so much better than what I felt before, heavy and confused.
AHA, it WAS a casino resort, so nothing much to do for me there. But that's exactly what I needed.
All I did was swim, nap, and read. Eat of course..
We had a cabana by the pool, and it was actually quite sweet. My body got tanned, for I haven't been swimming in a whilee.
Anyways, something about every detail of that place was just so adorable, I wanted nothing more than that.
Love&Jewels
Plans
Currently, listening to Satisfaction-Benny Benassi
Oh my my, how times have gone.
I will no longer be able to call myself an 8th grader.
I've been waiting for this week, for as long as I can remember. I've told myself I will never miss a place like JB, and at some point I even made myself believe this. But now that I'm graduating on this Friday, I feel nothing but shame for myself. Shame that I spent almost all the days here, wishing it was my last. Because now, even though I am so ready for my life ahead, I feel my last days should be spent longing it to last.
Having that said,
I'm still stoked for my plans up ahead.
Friday, I will be culminating in the 9AM ceremony. I'll most likely be going out to lunch with my parents, and meeting up with Kit and crash BC for a while.
By the time the 1:30PM ceremony ends, we'll be back to take pictures and such with the others.
I'll be back home to change and all while Christine has some time with her fam, and then she'll hit my pad.
We then are going Somewhere to look for circular barbells. We'll probably be so excited that we jump home all the way, and pierce that septum.
-Happy Dance-
And I'm prayingg she can do mine like a pro, because we're ditching them.
And I can do her's like a pro, because she'll literally slice my nose off if I don't.
Then, we're going to blow off that adrenaline going out for a movie.
Hopefully we can have a sleepyovery like a sleepyovary.
BAHAHAA!
And the next day, go to the Northridge Mall. Do some jewelry grabbing, and end up at my Praise Night. Where we'll scream and jump and whatnot, praising our hearts out, hopefully freeing me of all my troubles, and come home satisfied.
Graduation pictures, and such coming.
Love&Jewels
Oh my my, how times have gone.
I will no longer be able to call myself an 8th grader.
I've been waiting for this week, for as long as I can remember. I've told myself I will never miss a place like JB, and at some point I even made myself believe this. But now that I'm graduating on this Friday, I feel nothing but shame for myself. Shame that I spent almost all the days here, wishing it was my last. Because now, even though I am so ready for my life ahead, I feel my last days should be spent longing it to last.
Having that said,
I'm still stoked for my plans up ahead.
Friday, I will be culminating in the 9AM ceremony. I'll most likely be going out to lunch with my parents, and meeting up with Kit and crash BC for a while.
By the time the 1:30PM ceremony ends, we'll be back to take pictures and such with the others.
I'll be back home to change and all while Christine has some time with her fam, and then she'll hit my pad.
We then are going Somewhere to look for circular barbells. We'll probably be so excited that we jump home all the way, and pierce that septum.
-Happy Dance-
And I'm prayingg she can do mine like a pro, because we're ditching them.
And I can do her's like a pro, because she'll literally slice my nose off if I don't.
Then, we're going to blow off that adrenaline going out for a movie.
Hopefully we can have a sleepyovery like a sleepyovary.
BAHAHAA!
And the next day, go to the Northridge Mall. Do some jewelry grabbing, and end up at my Praise Night. Where we'll scream and jump and whatnot, praising our hearts out, hopefully freeing me of all my troubles, and come home satisfied.
Graduation pictures, and such coming.
Love&Jewels
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Weekend Away.
This weekend, I'll be at Haarahs.
What I'll do there? I have no clue, I don't even want to go.
Last thing I need is to be away.
Love&Jewels
What I'll do there? I have no clue, I don't even want to go.
Last thing I need is to be away.
Love&Jewels
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Irony
Have you ever experienced so much confusion, it almost even made sense?
To my desmay, confusion has been building up on me until today, when finally I exploded. And all these people by me trying to help me out confuses me even more for I know exactly what's going through their minds.
Caught the irony?
This now, is not the thing that confuses, but depresses me, this person that is beating herself up for what I'm going through, like it's her fault, depresses me. I have no courage to speak up and reassure her that I'll get through this like any other times I fell down. She is the one who've seen me take my first steps, and was there to comfort me when I tripped and fell from those first steps.
Yeah, stupid thing to be afraid of, but honestly, thinking of it just scares the hell out of me.
Being here right now, makes me a coward.
How would you make yourself,
braver?
Love&Jewels
To my desmay, confusion has been building up on me until today, when finally I exploded. And all these people by me trying to help me out confuses me even more for I know exactly what's going through their minds.
Caught the irony?
This now, is not the thing that confuses, but depresses me, this person that is beating herself up for what I'm going through, like it's her fault, depresses me. I have no courage to speak up and reassure her that I'll get through this like any other times I fell down. She is the one who've seen me take my first steps, and was there to comfort me when I tripped and fell from those first steps.
Yeah, stupid thing to be afraid of, but honestly, thinking of it just scares the hell out of me.
Being here right now, makes me a coward.
How would you make yourself,
braver?
Love&Jewels
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
If
Everyone has had their time in the sun, the moments in their life where everything seemed magic, and nothing could falter.
For me, this period of time was 2008ish.
I'm not suggesting at all, that this would be the end of my happiness, or the best of what I have left of my life, but merely dreaming how great it would be to go back to this time.
It would be great, but IF I were to be rewinding my life back so this year would repeat itself over and over, I'd truely be some sort of pain inducer.
Why you ask?
Take a look at all these disasters that has happened in the course of my happy 2008ish
January : 300 killed in Kenya, burning thousands of homes, farms, and property.
February: Venezuelen plane crashes killing all passengers.
March: Ohio, 13 die, hundreds evacuated from their own homes due to floods.
April: 80 people have died, and at least 75,000 infected in Rio de Janeiro from dengue fever outbreak
May: Tornadoes in several states of the United States of America killing hundreds in just one day.
June: Typhoon hits a ferry killing 800 passengers and crew.
July: Excessive rain in Ukraine and Romania causes up to $300 million in damage and kills 20.
If I were to repeat this year for who knows how long, the rest of the world suffering in agony will be repeating possibly the worst year of their life, because of my own selfish desires.
I may be going through tough times, but would I want somebody to be reliving their happiness just for themselves and let me rot in some pit of down lows?
Just as that, I may be in the lowest bottom of my life so far, but this just means I got more space to shoot up in to the highest moments of my life.
Clear as that.
Love&Jewels
For me, this period of time was 2008ish.
I'm not suggesting at all, that this would be the end of my happiness, or the best of what I have left of my life, but merely dreaming how great it would be to go back to this time.
It would be great, but IF I were to be rewinding my life back so this year would repeat itself over and over, I'd truely be some sort of pain inducer.
Why you ask?
Take a look at all these disasters that has happened in the course of my happy 2008ish
January : 300 killed in Kenya, burning thousands of homes, farms, and property.
February: Venezuelen plane crashes killing all passengers.
March: Ohio, 13 die, hundreds evacuated from their own homes due to floods.
April: 80 people have died, and at least 75,000 infected in Rio de Janeiro from dengue fever outbreak
May: Tornadoes in several states of the United States of America killing hundreds in just one day.
June: Typhoon hits a ferry killing 800 passengers and crew.
July: Excessive rain in Ukraine and Romania causes up to $300 million in damage and kills 20.
August: When hurricane hits, the whole Caribbean is left homeless, and starving.
September: 100s die, and leaves hundreds more injured from collapse of religious temple.
October: Earthquake hitting Pakistan killing hundreds and leaving 15,000 homes damaged
November: Fires consume 40,000 acres.
December: 11 people are buried in avalanches, 3 found, all left buried.
If I were to repeat this year for who knows how long, the rest of the world suffering in agony will be repeating possibly the worst year of their life, because of my own selfish desires.
I may be going through tough times, but would I want somebody to be reliving their happiness just for themselves and let me rot in some pit of down lows?
Just as that, I may be in the lowest bottom of my life so far, but this just means I got more space to shoot up in to the highest moments of my life.
Clear as that.
Love&Jewels
Monday, June 8, 2009
Broken
Life in Los Angeles is a broken record.
It seems to me I've trapped myself in a room, a room where I can't enjoy the world's sunshine nor the breeze. Where I can't feel the world's pains and joys.
Where I can't hear their laughter, nor sufferings.
I've been locked up in this room because I'm afraid to hear beyond the part of the song LA's broken record offers.
Love&Jewels
It seems to me I've trapped myself in a room, a room where I can't enjoy the world's sunshine nor the breeze. Where I can't feel the world's pains and joys.
Where I can't hear their laughter, nor sufferings.
I've been locked up in this room because I'm afraid to hear beyond the part of the song LA's broken record offers.
Love&Jewels
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